My feet at Bealls ….again Oh how I love Bealls


pantheraVLUU L200  / Samsung L200

VLUU L200  / Samsung L200

VLUU L200  / Samsung L200

VLUU L200  / Samsung L200

VLUU L200  / Samsung L200

VLUU L200  / Samsung L200

VLUU L200  / Samsung L200Oh how I love Bealls

Omg am I becoming a shopaholic yikes. I bought a bunch of jeans and a purse but returned them and instead kept the two dresses, shirt and cute purple flashlight. I’m in love with my new flashlight. I went to Tropical Smoothie today and got the buffalo chicken wrap yum yum yum with a chocolate chip cookie and an orange smoothie…kids size lol. Then later on after getting almond milk, cow’s milk and bleach spray….(brother has a cold and I need to disinfect everything constantly) my best friend said she was calling the cops when I texted her earlier and since then she hasn’t text me back. Maybe I should FB her to see what she’s up to and if she’s okay. Last night I had very odd dreams. I dreamt of Jonathan Brandis and Steven Strait (I watched The Covenant last night) and I was working with them as well as other models and thespians in LA and Miami and at one point I remember Jonathan Brandis doing a photo shoot but he was posing like Panthera from Wraeththu while wearing an outfit I’d seen him wear in one of his photos. I remember that the areas we shot in were on top of buildings during the day with people everywhere in swim wear and other sunny clothing. There are palm tress and the sky is blue. The dream is not one continual modelling or acting job more like many different jobs and clips from them all seeming to be like the jobs I did in Miami but alot more positive no yelling or overly long hours or extreme heat etc.. The other dream was of the end of the world. This was about the world’s atmosphere collapsing or changing because earths rotation had altered and the world had changed it’s distance from the sun which would cause tidal waves and other types of natural disasters, extreme weather and climate changes. Being who I am I’ve already decided to just die but I live with a group of people like the people from Beasts Of The Southern Wild who’ve decided to find a way to survive. When the climate starts to change a large tidal wave about 100 feet high and that looks very real and up close and personal comes at us from the ocean that we live close to and when it comes, like the others I climb up the building to the top so that I won’t drown. The buildings are the same type as the ones in the Southern Wild movie
but the people are not quite as brash as the characters of the movie are. We have buildings set up on high hills where we go to get food and hang out etc.. I distinctly remember one woman who is about 40 or so years old with pale skin and very long very black hair. We spend a bit of time simply living maybe a few days or so but then we see another ruffle in the ocean just a regular sized deep sea wave but because we are so on edge we think that wave is going to also be a tidal wave and we start climbing again but instead the wave just ripples away like a normal wave and then the dream is over. I’m not sure if we will survive but maybe we will. All during the dream I had a very ominous feeling, a feeling that it was just a matter of time before we’ll die and sooner rather than later. After all it was told to us by the scientists that the world would just get more and more inhospitable until we all died.

So anyways I loooove my new dresses, shirt and flashlight and I am almost finished watching Now You See Me. This movie is awesome awesome awesome…………….I believe in magic again lol.

P.S. I can’t wait for Bealls or some other store to finally get some boots that I can fit it’s officially winter I could feel the change in the air today. It’s so disheartening to be able to put my feet into a pair of shoes and yet not be able to buy them because they’re just a little too tight for me :(. On a happy not I have had a feeling of being light and more alive recently. Maybe it has something to do with the support group, I’m very happy I found them or maybe it’s because winter is a time when things become sterile and right now with the transition from one season to the other it’s very nice temperature wise outside…not perfect but nice all the same. Also I still have to try on all the clothes I got at the clothing swap yesterday. I washed everything and even wore some of the outfits today to go shopping.

P.P.S I almost bought a watch today, it was sooo pretty on me. I had to actually force myself to not buy it, I mean duh I have a cell phone lol. Wierd how people don’t really wear watches anymore, I miss that. Maybe I should make myself stand out and wear one but I’m scared,.. it had a gold coloring and even though it’s not real gold I saw that thing on the news about the guy trying to steal the man’s gold chain and now I’m scared to wear things that resemble real jewelry. I should worry less lol.

Just for reference I’ve added 2 photos one of Jonathan Brandis and one of Panthera, hope you likey lol….I do


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